The takeover

[someguy]

So happy.
Think you could give more descriptive comments here on how awsome it is ?

[LovelyUndeadVam]

hahaha. it was VERY VERY awesome. like, i was reading it, but i couldn't stop! it was really action packed and there are only three chapters so far! i can't wait for the fourth chapter!

that in my opinion, is an awesome book. if i'm sitting here thinking "WHAT is going to HAPPEN?!" then it's an awesome book. i have VERY good taste in books.

[someguy]

Do you like how I kinda put in a cliffhanger at the end of the third chapter?

[LovelyUndeadVam]

well you're supposed to. keeps the readers interested and going. althogh occasionally i like to make a chapter where you can stop and mark your place. that's just my writing style though. i'm not sure how you prefer to write.

[someguy]

Yeah. It was a good cliffhanger.
Kinda like, "OMG WHATS GING TO HAPPEN TO THEM!!!"

[LovelyUndeadVam]

seriously.

[someguy]

I'm working on Chapter 4.
Be anticipated.

[LovelyUndeadVam]

i'm not only anticipating it, i'm DYING for it! hurry, but don't make it sound rushed!

[someguy]

It won't I think I'll delay it just to torture you.

[LovelyUndeadVam]

not nice!

[someguy]

Chapter 4 is up.

[Justeazy]

" more of them would here it,"
should be
" more of them would hear it,"

and, also
"if she got to cocky"
should be
"if she got too cocky"
(both in chapter 4)

I like the book tho!

[someguy]

Ah, thanks for catching that.
I'll change them.

It seems that every good writer makes some stupid mistakes sometimes. I can never seem to get away from that.

[LovelyUndeadVam]

"It seemes that it had taken..." that should be "seems"

"And when she saw them, she though" THAT should be thought. i'm treating this like i would if i were reading a printed and bound copy of it. hope you don't mind.

very very well done on that one! i'm anticipating the next chapter as i eat my awesome food.

[someguy]

oh yum.
I'll change that too.