3 things you can do with...

[tipper75]

Pet it.
Walk it.
Eat it

Sunscreen Lotion

[OscarW]

OneBun better not hear it

Use it
Drink it
Lose it

Coconut

[RBS]

drill two holes and drink the milk
saw it in half and peel out the meat
make the classic bra out of the two empty halves

a pen that won't write

[tipper75]

Scribble , scribble, scribble until it writes.
Throw it away.
Leave it to you favorite bartender.

Paper Weight

[OscarW]

Keep papers down
Collect them
Throw them (great stress relief)

soap-box cart

[RBS]

build it
find a small kid to ride in it
trick it out with chrome and faux fur

a non-winning lottery ticket

[funja]

Say you won and wave it around
return it and say you didnt like it
use as a tissue

a broken phone

[RBS]

Stand in a crowded place and pretend you are talking to someone important
Whistle a ringtone, answer it, hand it to a stranger and say "its for you"
Put an old timey looking label on it "if found return to A. G. Bell"

a ukulele

[tipper75]

What kind of broken phone?

A cell phone - try to get your numbers off it and recycle it.
A home wireless phone - send it to the recycle center.
The old crank types, well you have to use that to drive all the fish out of your favorite catfish ponds

A broken Compact Fluorescent Bulb

[Lilliputt]

Look at it
Wonder what it does
Fail to fix it

A cute kitten

[OscarW]

Pet it
Take pictures of it
Make it a moderator (Escapegirl)

Shades

[Lilliputt]

Use them as sun glasses
Use them as blinds for a window
Track down vampires by not spotting them on one

super glue

[OscarW]

Glue things together
Flame-thrower (Blues Brothers)
As a Prank

Vampire

[Lilliputt]

Happily greet him/her
Suspiciously question his/her gazing of my neck
Offer a nice fresh glas of Holy Water

An Oscar

[OscarW]

Win it
Lose it
Publish him

a Guido