The "Let it out" Thread

[doglover]

From the moment you joined the forums, there was a huge impact (a good one), and I believe that most of what we have now is because of you. You'll be greatly missed here, darling. I'm glad I know where to find you.

[Jones]

Today I got ripped off in Computer class! I did a project on King Henry VIII and I did SO much more work than a whole bunch of other people! Yet I still got a worse grade than them!

Apparently, dazzling pictures and a couple of extra slides is more important than factual information! According to my computer teacher, that is...

[SuzyE730]

Due to recent events the game creators of 2POAM games have decided to ask the staff of this forum to please have our accounts deleted. We do not support certain decisions made by the staff and so feel we have overstayed our welcome. It is not our intention to continue visiting this site on a regular basis and we will be on the lookout for another place to post our games.
Thank you
2POAM ~ Lilliputt and Sandbox

(I just saw the thread)
O_O but but..... WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
but it will be less fun around here without you! but after all it's you decision so Goodbye Lilli and Sandbox

@Jones
well there are teachers that just act like big doo-doo heads! () Like my Geography teacher.... I had a project and it had just 1 little mistake and she yelled at me like I robbed a bank!
but well if it's a computer class maybe the assignment wasn't to get a whole bunch of information... I dunno maybe your task was to make something that looks cool ...cuz that's what we do in our computer class....

[Jones]

I guess you are right. It still makes me pretty mad though, because I put a lot of work into it.

[Crimsonthread]

Due to recent events the game creators of 2POAM games have decided to ask the staff of this forum to please have our accounts deleted. We do not support certain decisions made by the staff and so feel we have overstayed our welcome. It is not our intention to continue visiting this site on a regular basis and we will be on the lookout for another place to post our games.
Thank you
2POAM ~ Lilliputt and Sandbox

I haven't replied to this message yet, but I want to voice my support for the 2POAM team. While their presence will be missed by many, I wholeheartedly understand and support their decisions.

I think it's very unfortunate that some people lack the decency to take problems among members seriously, and then refuse to accept apologies over misunderstandings. It also seems that there may be double-standards here. The rules say, "Any content with the aim to offend or hurt others won't be tolerated." However, some posts that have offended and hurt members have remained unedited in the forums with little consequence to the posters, despite following proper procedures for reporting such posts.

I'm saddened to think that the Gamershood forum has come to this. I always saw this as a safe place, where concerns were heard and taken seriously. Now I see that this isn't always the case. Gamershood Planet is not the same place I came to love when I joined, and I fear that unless something changes, it will continue to deteriorate into a place where there is no justice for the members that helped create it.

[Brimful-Asha]

Seeing your response to the matter Crimson has given me some sort of confidence and support boost and I too wish to raise some issues that concern me.

This a quote of rule number three of this forum:
3. "Do not make personal attacks on members or staff members, neither in the threads nor by private messaging. Any content with the aim to offend or hurt others won't be tolerated."
Yet in the Photo Contest thread this has been posted:
"It WAS intended as a joke. If it bothers you that much I would have preferred that you have the DECENCY to tell me. I would have been happy to delete one."
I believe that accusing someone of lacking decency just because the person failed to PM is deliberately hurtful. How is it that this post made by a moderator is still in the thread unedited or deleted for a weeks time?"


In the same thread Lilliputt took responsibility for her posts and asked a certain Mod for forgiveness because the said Mod felt hurt by her post. It can be debated if Lilliputt actually meant to hurt anyone, but what is an obvious fact is that Lilliputt's apology was never accepted. I have been in contact with Lilliputt and know that the said Mod was sent a PM by Lilliputt at the time it all occured in order to sort this issue out. The PM was never answered. Instead, when Lilliputt posted in "Let it out thread" the particular Mod answered by suggesting that Lilliputt made accusations and then left, instead of trying to clear misunderstandings. I think this is very unfair. I would like an explanation and I would like justice!

The post made by another Mod suggests to me that the moderators of this forum have set double standards. The posts made by The first mentioned Mod suggests unfair treatment. Is this what we should expect from those who have been given authority in order to protect us?

[dia]

Well, I haven't replied to that message either..I'm so sad that something like that have happened..I take the chance from crimson's post and allow me to agree with her.To be honest, I haven't seen posts that were offensive to other members, but since the incident happened, I don't feel as comfortable as I used to be..This place feels like it's my online cafeteria that i meet my friends and have good fun together, making jokes, laugh, playing games, talk about things that concerns us...Since this have happened, I'm a little cautious with my posts because my English sometimes can be really "bad" and I don't want to be misunderstood..I hope that if that happens, I'll be given a chance to explain what I really meant...

[Kahnescanuck]

I must say first of all that I am new to this forum and I quickly found that there are many great people here. I was surprised by how Lilliput and Sandbox's situation was handled. I am fully aware of what transpired and I am in full support of the above posts.
They pretty much summed it up. Lilliputt and Sandbox were long time members and to see how Lilliputt was hurt by a public accusation makes me question if I want to stay at this forum. If this could happen to someone who was a loyal and longtime member, what about someone new like me? I am trying to remember and abide by all the rules but face it, we all mess up once in awhile and I believe we should be forgiven with grace especially after apologizing for a misunderstanding. I've grown to love this site and it's unique sense of community and family. This situation has tarnished that feeling. I hope this can be all cleared up and Lilliputt and Sandbox get the apology they deserve so we can all put this behind us.

[Crimsonthread]

Sumi, Dia, and Kahnescanuck:

Thank you for posting your support. I'm very glad I'm not the only one who feels this way.

[Adventure]

It surprises me to see you know it all so well, especially since you only see and heard one side of the story. Perhaps it have crossed your minds there could be more at the matter than it looks in first instance? Further I don't think you can force anyone to accept an apology and sometimes it takes times. Couldn't it be that the others were hurt as well? If an apology is not accepted as soon as someone wishes, is this a reason to ask to delete your account? Perhaps so, it appears so. But like I just said sometimes there are more things going on than it looks.
It hurts me to be accused for not taking problems among members seriously and for having double-standards. This is so not true. But how can you know, since everything what is discussed in moderation is private and remains private. We don't going to hang out the dirty laundry.

But go ahead and spit it all out. Who knows, perhaps something good might comes out of this.

[Crimsonthread]

Adventure,

I certainly did not mean to offend. This is the "let it out" thread, and I've been frustrated with how certain things have happened over the past few months. It's true, we've only heard one side of the story. I would love to be able to take in both sides of the story, but as you've said, things moderators discuss are kept private, so it's difficult to find both sides of the story.

As far as the apology, I understand that it takes time to accept them sometimes. But the apologies were also ignored... so there was no way to know whether there was a chance of acceptance in the future. Some acknowledgement of the apologies would have been very nice.

Regarding the double-standards, it's possible that the term is too harsh. However, above-mentioned posts are still left for anyone to read... even when it was made clear that it caused a member pain. Since these posts were made by moderators, it's easy for someone to interpret it as a double-standard. Additionally, other posts made by members have hurt people involved in this conversation, and from what I've seen, little was done to stop it. Again, I only have one side of the story, but it's hard to see another point of view when members involved in disagreements are not allowed to take part in the discussion with moderators.

Once more, my post was not intended to hurt anyone--just to make a point and release some of the frustration I've been feeling. I apologize if I've offended anyone.

[Sandbox]

Being part of 2poam, I of all people understand, having misunderstandings. I have learned quickly that sometimes the things I say are misunderstood, partly because I forgot a smiley, or I didn't translate properly to Lilli, and in turn she has done the same to me.

I also think the comments that were made were rude, and feel appologies are in order. There does seem to be a double standard in regards to the rules, and I am in agreement that the rules are made for everyone, and everyone including the moderation and administration need to follow those rules. You can not enforce what you yourself do not follow. It breds contempt.

In regards to what happened to me, I went to the proper people, and tried to do what I was suppose to do. To those who helped, or tried to help, and saw the problem as serious, thank you.

With my troubles still continue, and I was forced to take matters into my own hands, and involve parents, which breaks a rule of not discussing members. So I made the choice to leave. As I said the trouble still continues.

I felt attacked by what happened to me, and now I feel stalked, and I understand, how Lilli is feeling at the moment. After repeated attempts to get this account deleted, I still do not have satisfaction, my requests are ignored.

I support Lilli in her choice because it is unclear in a lot of members minds, how things will be handled, and I thank everyone who has stood with her, and I through all of this.

Sandbox

[Lilliputt]

As the second part of the 2POAM game creating team I can only second my partners’ opinions. I would like to say that I understand and agree with the posts made by Dia, Crimsonthread Kahnescanuck and Sumitra. I would like to show my support with this post.
I ask of the moderation team to think about what is important: to be right or to be concerned about what your members are reacting to. Only that.

~Lilliputt

[Adventure]

@Crismon, thank you for your reply. I appreciate everything what you have said. I will PM you tomorrow or the day after. I have a busy day tomorrow, don't know how much energy I will have in the evening. It very late here I only have slept a little 2 hours last night, so I really need my rest now. I hope you understand.

@Sandbox
I don't know to what comments you refer to that were rude. If there were any I agree an apologize would be in order. But so far I know, there weren't made any rude comments by any of us moderators.
The only rude posts I see are those who accuse us of having double standards. I am not saying I never broke any rules. It happened I accidentally created a double post or that I spoiled too much info of a riddle while I didn't know I was spoiling too much. But I didn't do it on purpose and I always corrected as soon as I realized. And it isn't like we give out warnings or ban people who breaking the rules accidentally. Although I remember we were accused for doing this. But that's ridiculous.

Regarding your accounts. They weren't deleted yet, because Gamershood is having technical difficulties with his own account and therefore he can't delete any account at the moment. Since you both have a large amount of posts we were afraid that deleted your accounts could cause problems for the forums. So we asked GamersHood to look into this. We only know since yesterday he was experiencing problems with his account, otherwise we would have sooner looked into this ourselves. Meanwhile I have read enough about vBulletin software to know that deleting you account will not cause any problem. I will delete your accounts first thing in the morning. I first need to get some sleep and it will give you some time to reply to what I just have written if you would like.

@Lilliputt
Moderators are members too. And we are also just people who can make mistakes. And our feelings can be hurt too. You are here only talking about your feeling and other members feeling which have been hurt. But apparently you don't realize your posts in Photo Contest hurt Jack and Mystery as well. And even before you apologized you asked Mystery to delete your account. How do you think how that make her feel? If you would have had a bit more of patience, Mystery would have accepted your apology, no doubt. But apparently this took too long for you and well.. the consequence we know all them. All what happened since then has hurt us all and I would wish we could turns things back, but unfortunately that's impossible.

For your question: Being wrong or right is not at the order. We do the best we can for the good will for the forums and its members. And we are concerned about what members react to and we always take it seriously, also when it is irrational. We can't take action just to please someone, we always have to look in a larger context and unfortunately it is impossible to make everyone happy. In example we can punish or ban someone because someone else interpret their post as hurtful or provoking, while it isn’t clear that post is indeed meant to hurt or to provoke. We are limited in what we can do, but we do our best. Everything we do and decide is well considered and we try to come up with the best solution as possible. And again we are just humans too, nobody can or may expect we are perfect. And moderation isn't a simple job. Many things we have to deal with are complicated and also difficult for us to handle. Often we have to put our personally feelings aside. And sometimes there just isn't a simple solution.

All I wish is that we can end this sad issue, which is based on a misunderstanding and different interpretations. I never thought things could go so out of control.

If anyone has complaints about how we moderate the forums or has suggestions how we could become better moderators, please post in the following thread:

http://www.gamershood.com/forum/showthread.php?t=274

Note: This post has been written without the approval of any of the other moderators and can only be considered as my personal let it out post.

[Mistery]

This is going to be my very personal reply on your posts - not an official "moderator post".

Well, as it has already been mentioned, you have heard one side of the story, and made your judgements upon that, but that doesn't matter now.
I can honestly say that I've always tried to do my best - certainly I have made mistakes, I'm not perfect as nobody is. I've put a lot of time and energy to keep the forum running, to answer countless questions, to give advice, to help out in games etc. And right now I feel that all this is not appreciated, and only misunderstandings or things that you perceive as wrong from your point of view counts. I'm not saying this to offend anyone, this is just how I feel at this very moment, so please don't give it too much importance

I've planned to sort out the misunderstanding in a personal email - at the moment it happened I was just too upset. Unfortunately this issue has been brought up since then almost on a daily basis by someone, so that I could not get some break from it to finally calm down in order to sort it out as I wanted.

But okay, you demand a public acceptance of Lilliputt's apology - be it public then, I accept your apology Lilli
You think I should apologise? I apologise to anyone whom I may have hurt - I've truly never wanted to hurt anyone. I wanted this place to be a friendly one for everyone, and if I completely failed, then I'm honestly sorry

And now I feel that this war should have an end, and hopefully everyone can be happy again soon enough, and the forums can get be back to normal

I can't tell yet about my personal consequences from this, for the moment I hope that you can forgive me.

Mistery